Comical Musings of a First Time Mom

Comical Musings of a First Time Mom

Comical Lessons of a First Time Mom what might you think this means. Things you obsessed over as a first-time mom or things no one ever warned you were going to be your new normal. I have also had some comical lessons as a first time mom along the way. I am sharing some of the laughs out loud or come to Jesus moments on this comical journey as a new mom. At each stage in life, there are numerous life lessons.  This path as a new mom is of no exception, it comes with highs, lows and most definitely comical moments.

Here some of my favorite comical lessons as a new mom.

Poop

Before having a baby I never knew poop would be such an exciting part of my day. The fear of the big bad wolf aka constipation is real. Watching a newborn whom can’t speak, grunt and groan in pain due to constipation is hard to watch. So now you count the days to poop day and freak when poop has not made an appearance in days :).

Baby wipes

Baby wipes become an essential and vital part of your day. It becomes a tool to clean and sanitize toys. Makeup removal for not only your child but for you, your husband, friends, and grandparents. Are you crying, here is a baby wipe, are you mad? cool off with a wipe.

Entertainer

You are now a one-woman show. As a one-woman show You can now sing, dance, play drums, perform magic tricks, and are an acrobat.  All the old and new nursery rhymes are now a part of your my music catalog. My husband gives me the side eye every time, he is privileged to witness one of my performances. I do believe it is because he is not as talented as I am in this department.  My all-time favorites are the itsy bitsy spider and the wheels on the bus. What’s yours?

Your house is no longer yours

As a couple who loves to have everything in its place and the house looking in order at all times. We might be the adults in the home, who pay the bills, but there is a new sheriff in town. Who loves to jump on the couch. Throws all the decorative pillows on the floor just for the fun of it. Brings out the pots and use them as a drum set. Beds are now for jumping not for sleeping.

What toys?

Before your first meeting, you buy all these fun colorful toys. With various instructions on how they will help to speed up accomplishing various developmental tasks. You are hoodwinked, in your zealous attempt to be prepared and help your child reach these milestones as soon as possible. what you don’t account for is an independent child who decides that your cell phone, pots, pans, tv remote and your shoes will be more fun. In comparison to the well-researched toys, you took the time and money to buy.

Two dreaded words why & why not?

We are now at the stage when we can have conversations with my son. Why, Why not are constant repetitive syllables, that I can now hear this words in my dreams.  Example of a typical conversation

  • mir: What are you doing mummy?
  • Mummy: I am eating Amir
  • mir: Why are you eating mummy?
  • Mummy: I am hungry and so I need to eat.
  • mir: why do you need to eat
  • Mummy: when you are hungry, you eat to be strong
  • At this point, all I want to do is eat my meal in peace, without questions, interrogations, and thought-provoking questions.

My cell phone is now our cellphone

As soon as my phone rings or vibrates, it seems like He has some spidery sense informing him who the caller is.  Ninety percent of the time he is on task, in identifying the caller with no knowledge of the caller id. It could also be that I don’t have a lot of friends.  I am stumped that he cant share this knowledge with me and we can be set for life.

  • Is that Daddy
  • I want to talk Daddy
  • It’s my turn mummy
  • I want the phone mummy
  • Mummy, mummy give me the phone.

Be warned, when you call my phone you should be prepared to dialogue with an inquisitive almost three-year-old.

Privacy

What privacy, that word is lost from your vocabulary the day you find out you are pregnant. My child joins me in the toilet, in the shower, and when I am painting my face as he calls it. Do you sneak out of the room to use the restroom, does it work for you. Because it does not work for me. That ESP always lets him know I am gone and the search begins.

What special gifts do your little ones possess? Please share some of the laughs out loud moments you have experienced thus far.

 

 

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